懐かしい。Nostalgia.

Today I am having kind of a romantic mood. I guess it is all Japanese winter. Winter in Moscow had had to be a very difficult time for me, as lack of sunshine led to gloomy mood and feeling that I just want to stay at home. Winter in Japan is so sunny, and today is too… It is almost sundown, and warm yellow light is filling my room. My cat is sleeping on her cat-tower and sometimes makes sound likes she is eating something.

In several months I will be moving to a new place, so I am often thinking: “This is the last January in this apartment and this neighbourhood”. And I remember how I was moving from Moscow to Yokohama, how I was thinking: “This is my last March in Moscow, will I ever come in March here again?”.  When you are saying goodbye, you can suddenly see the place in a different light. All the strings are cut, and you see it as in a movie, remembering all small details, good or bad, recreating some scenes from the past and smiling to how foolish you were, how happy you were… You are saying goodbye and letting it go, so from that moment it is just another chapter in your life, and it doesn’t bother you that much anymore, even if it wasn’t all that good.

I am feeling nostalgic, as I remember the times where I can’t return. Strangely, sometimes time feels like a place. There are those moments in your life that you like to repeat in your mind, and they are more about time that place, but still you are thinking about them as a place that you would like to visit or maybe not.

As the sun is hiding behind the Fuji-san, I think that from my new window I won’t see it, but I will remember these four years of our life together. Thank you, Fuji-san, for appearing in my window 🙂

Nostalgic piano by Yiruma

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